 I'm not a very organized person, especially when it comes to writing so I will attempt to maintain some kind of structure here. First I would like to talk about why I am here and what I think is so great about a forum such as this. Many people have this preconception that online dating is for the desperate or is a last resort. I don't think that’s true in any shape or form. To me the local dating scene was a waste of time because everyone is only focused on living in the moment and it is hard to narrow down the ones seeking an actual commitment. Here at filipina-lady we have a collection of different people each one beautiful and unique, but we all share a common goal, to find that one special person to share our lives with. We didn’t come here for a quick fling. I am a single father raising a son on my own and the last thing that I want is a "girlfriend" who will come into our lives, build an attachment with my son and then leave on her merry way never thinking twice about it. If I am to bring someone into my son’s life it needs to be permanent. His mother walked out on him and I don't want him to have a bad perception on women and relationships, so I want all or nothing. I came here because this is an amazing forum of people who generally seek the same level of commitment. AND NOW SOME LESSONS THAT I HAVE LEARNT ALONG THE WAY. This site is not a quick fix, you can't simply pick out a pretty face and say "that’s the one". That may work in the local dating scene or with past relationships but how did that work out for you in the long run? The best policy is to be active and participate, comment on blogs, or write your own, make yourself noticed even if people do not respond to your comments people read them. Look around, introduce yourself, take the time to try to get to know people. Find some common interests, look for some depth in conversation, express yourself. Let people know who you are, maybe someone has been checking you out and is shy. A nice blog or comment might be the door opener they are looking for. Fill out your profile information. A lot of us come here looking for certain qualities. How can we know if you possess them if you don't tell us about it. Lastly, be prepared for rejection and relationships that just don't work out. Sometimes things just don't work, you can't force it, love needs to be mutual. That’s why I suggest friendship first, get to know each other, don't make promises early in a relationship if you can't keep them. FINAL WORDS I could write endlessly, and contradict myself a million times because the heart works in mysterious ways. Sometimes the words you use do not fit the thoughts in your mind. But If I could offer any advice on my experiences here, it would be: be active, and participate in the site, make yourself noticed - I can't stress how important that is. Be patient, this is not a quick fix or instant relationship, you need to build a solid foundation and build up from that - a tree grows from the roots to the sky, it doesn't fall from the sky and then grow roots. Be strong, be prepared to have your heart broken, and to unintentionally break hearts along the way. There is a difference between the first one and the right one, but don't be naive and expect it to happen instantly. And lastly, be honest, and be open. You're here for the long haul. If you hide aspects about yourself or lie to try to make yourself appear something you're not, you are only going to cause trouble. No ones perfect and nobody expects them to be, just be yourselves, be active, get noticed, be persistent, and someone will pay attention. Good luck to everyone here at filipina-lady.net Subscribe to Asian Dating Members |
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